I thought I was going crazy, but now if confirmed this... The lifetime sales number on my dashboard is changing without having any new transactions. Yesterday it was $x71.79. Today it is $x92.71. The only thing I can think of is that orders in a foreign currency are not "frozen" as the rate at the time of the order, and are all recalculated every time the page is rendered.
Comments
I can't comment on your craziness, but I can't see anything wrong with the code at the moment.